Okay ladies. Where are we on Ian Somerhalder?? I didn’t start watching Lost until after he had been killed off…so, I didn’t really notice his smoking hotness until Vampire Diaries. And notice him, I certainly have. Hello Blue Eyes and sexy smirk. To borrow from Rachael Ray, YUM-O!
He’s got the gorgeous eyes, the JBF tousled hair, nice lips, even some biceps…could he be hotter than, dare I even voice this?, Robert Pattinson?? I think, if you look at him objectively, yes. He is, on paper, better looking. But, in a pretty way. Like a Rob Lowe pretty. Or a Chace Crawford pretty (but much less elfin than Chace, kwim?) I like the pretty, I do. But…I have to say…Rob wins. He has the eyes, the hair, the lips (no biceps but I don’t care!) PLUS the accent (ppppuuurrrrrr) and the-rough-around-the-edges, anti-pretty thing he has going on. But, it is close AND Vampire Diaries is on every week…hhhmmmm…
**Note to Robert, shave the damn beard and we won’t even have to mention Ian/Vampire Diaries ever again…
Paperwork. This week. Healthcare claims followup (new insurance plan means more work…sigh) School re-reg. forms x 2 (gee, I get to pay $200 to write my freaking name/address multiple times? growl). Passport renewal forms x 2. (kids under 16 – can’t renew by mail AND are only valid for 5 years. hissssss). Boy Scout registration. Application for First Penance/First Communion (again, I get to pay $50 to fill out info that they already have somewhere. groan)…I suck at paperwork. This is why I do NOT work outside the home, damnit.
Vehicle Maintenance. Infinitely less fun than the Cougar variety. Must renew registration and get emissions etc. BUT, must have windshield repaired first. Sigh. Yes, I have known about this for a long time…and have given myself 3 days to get it done.
2nd grade book report. Groan in frustration. It’s not a big deal but *someone* is a perfectionist w/no fine motor skills.
Highrise. This is a super duper fun project management tool that the Frug uses for work and has decided to f*cking torture me with it. Daily I get emails that say ‘Highrise/Frug Frugerson has assigned a task to you’ and it will say ‘Passports: Due TODAY’. And then I’ll get a follow-up email reminding me that the task is overdue. Murderous rage.
The Dog. So over that Beast. Woke me up at 4am whining in his crate like a bitch. UGH. Yes, a 3 yr old dog still in a crate at night. Why? B/c he WILL NOT leave the cat alone. Ever. It’s her only ‘safe’ time of the day.
The 11 year old. For being the Drama Queen that he is. And the boy is a c*ckblocker too. This past Sat. nite, he was up at 11pm when we got home. Like he WANTED to prevent me from having marital fun. Cue frustrated howl.
The 8 year old. Whiny, needy, argumentative. He smacked G in the face yesterday ‘he SMILED at me!’ (meanwhile, G and I were both snickering b/c Mr Perfect got ‘in trouble’ at school for the first time!)…nasty temper on that one. I have no idea where he got that from. Must be the Frug’s side of the family…
The Frug. Just because no Sh*t List would be complete without one’s husband, right?
Robert Pattinson. I know! How can he be on this list? It’s the @$(&$%@ beard. Did you see him on the Haiti telethon? I had to close my eyes and just listen to the beautiful accent b/c my eyes were horrified by the dead animal on his chin. Damnit, Rob! You know I don’t like a full-on beard! (just ask Brad Pitt!)
So, to recap…the only creature in my home NOT on the list is the cat. Sweet bundle of fur that she is. Since I’ve done the ‘married w/kids’ thing…can I go ahead with the ‘crazy lady w/cat’ scenario???
Kisses to my Ashley! My niece is getting a life do-over. A clean slate! Kissing the Poconos Good-Bye and Good Riddance! She’s moving back to NYC! Upper East Side! Woot! She has a great new bartending job AND had a terrific interview for a ‘day job’ in the FASHION World! Beyotch is so fab now she may disown me! Sure hope not…I plan on sleeping on her floor next time I go to NYC for Rob-Stalking…lol and by now you know I am NOT kidding.