Archive | March 2011

Really irritated at Prince William

Why do I care? WHY?! lol

I have been annoyed all day about this. I know there are guys who don’t wear wedding rings. But everyone knows they are douche bags, right? Prince William does not seem like a douche bag cheater or anything, right?  He really seems like a decent kid. So, wear the damn ring, William. Actually, fine. You don’t have to wear it all the time but at least get married with one.

Aren’t there lines in the wedding ceremony about “take this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity”?? So, no ring is a sign of what then?? Exactly.

Spa Week is coming!!

Click on the Spa Week link, enter your zip code and find out where the deals are!  $50 spa treatments!  I found massages, facials, laser hair removal, etc. for only $50! #stillnotFrugapproved *shrieks*  I also saw a $50 Endermologie treatment…am curious about this…I’m thinking it’s probably a scam…but, for $50 it worth a try, right? If nothing else, it’s a deep tissue massage/steamroller treatment for the thighs and butt! #win.

Katie Holmes “Horrified” by Suri Penis Gummies Incident – Moms & Babies –



haha! The infamous “Penis Gummies” incident!  Apparently, Katie addressed this photo on Ellen the other day.

(In pics that stormed the web, Suri checked out a colorful box of “Penis Gummies,” featuring drawings of anatomically correct chewy candies.)

Continued Holmes sheepishly: “P-e-n-i-s gummies. I said, oh wow those aren’t Swedish fish. . . They are called p-e-n-i-s gummies and they look like it.”


Um, Katie? You can say penis. You’re a grown woman and a mother. It’s the anatomically correct term for it. Spelling it out like that makes it seem like you’re afraid of it…or maybe are just unfamiliar with it?? Hmm.

Katie Holmes “Horrified” by Suri Penis Gummies Incident – Moms & Babies –

Arg!!! Ugly Armpits!

Armpits. *shudders* I hate armpits. And yet, armpits fascinate me. If you raise your arms in front of me, I am so looking at those pits. I just am. *hair flip* I am obsessed w/furr-free pits. I am, however, cursed with underarms that seem unable to be closely shaven. Always a 5 o’clock shadow there. The only thing that works is waxing but I HATE HATE HATE the feeling of stubbly pits during the grow-out-the-hair week(s). So dirty. So manly. Yuck.

Anyway, looks like I am not alone in armpit-worry…

This is from the WSJ, via Gawker:

Remember to include the Unilever corporation on your Christmas card list this year, ladies: without their groundbreaking research, you wouldn’t know enough to be publicly concerned about the hideousness of your armpit region.

I mean, you’ve probably been walking around for years with repulsive, off-putting underarms, constantly serving as a living mockery of your put-together appearance. Those days are over. The WSJ says that Unilever’s research found that “93% of women consider their armpits unattractive.” Haha! It’s so true, ladies. And don’t even get us started on the soles of your feet.

Thankfully, the Unilever corporation has designed a new product that you can purchase to address this heretofore unimportant problem. “Dove Ultimate Go Sleeveless, which hits U.S. stores this week, claims its formula of specialized moisturizers will give women better-looking underarms in five days.” Can you really afford not to purchase it? Every day without an application of Dove Ultimate Go Sleeveless is a day that you fall farther behind in the eternal underarm beauty race.

Buy it now, women. You have no choice.

*dust cloud* Off to buy Dove Ultimate Go Sleeveless!  (also thinking of the adage – Sleeveless is a Privilege, not a Right)

In stark contrast to LiLo, here’s Rob Lowe

Sweet Mother of DILFs, Hellooooo Rob! *purrs*

The man is 47. Forty Freaking SEVEN!  L-Double O-K-I-N-G, Looking Good!  Looking Good! *cheers* (bonus points to all former cheerleaders who did the finger-glasses and chanted along with me)

So, the bare chest is full of el queso but still…Rob seriously looks great. From his sexy smirk to his blue steel, Rob has held up well. Mmmm.

MichaelK from Dlisted had some snark for Rob…check it…

Kevin Federline to be a Dad for Fifth Time! – Moms & Babies –

OMFG!  BIRTH CONTROL STAT!!!!!!  Why does Hollywood seem to be anti-birth control? Actress types who don’t want to get fat on the Pill or the shot? Ego maniacal actors who want to spread their seed??

Well, neither of those fit KFed and his GF at all. This clown has FOUR other kids…33 years old…famous for being Britney’s ex-husband??  *shakes head*

Kevin Federline to be a Dad for Fifth Time! – Moms & Babies –

This is what 25 looks like?

Lindsay!!  Holy Old Whore Alert. Wowsa. I have fewer wrinkles that that.  And her eyes? They look like they have seen some serious shit, kwim?

Clean living, chicas. So important. Let this photo be a wakeup call to all you potential crack hoes out there! (again, what is the plural of Ho when you do NOT mean the hoe that you rake with?? I hate putting the ‘ to make it Ho’s like the Ho owns something *snorts*)

MichaelK at Dlisted wrote some funny shizz about Lindsay…go read it!