Last summer, Ashlee tried to tell me about Amy Schumer. “OMG, you’ll love her!” Meh. Not interested. Until now. She. Is. Amazing. She’s doing these music videos/reg. videos that have me both howling and nodding my head “YES!” Hard to pick a fave. I may blog about them separately.
Today’s Amy Schumer classic is “Last Fuckable Day“…a group of actresses/comedians are celebrating one’s “Last Fuckable Day” — the last time she is considered “fuckable” in Hollywood. Which is, of course, before 40 generally. And men stay fuckable forever. Even when they are old and grey and wrinkled everywhere. Ahem. Think about it. George Clooney. Still fuckable at 53 (54 next week, old man!) and yet Madonna (MADONNA!) is gross and unfuckable at 56. She made out with Drake at a concert and he looked like he wanted to throw up. MADONNA IS UNFUCKABLE, people. I mean, who’s next? Is Courteney Cox unfuckable at 50? Jennifer Aniston at 46??
I’ve been thinking about this for a while now. As women, we age and get OLD. Men age and get “distinguished.” Why is that? We try so hard. We certainly try harder than they do. Jerks. We exercise and diet and use pills and potions and injections and surgery and still end up as gross old ladies. WHY WHY WHY? I turned 49 this year and I am definitely looking and feeling every single minute of 49. I read an interview with Candace Bergen. She is GORGEOUS, right? Classically beautiful woman. She said something like “where there used to be interest, there’s nowpoliteness.” Politeness. Yes. I find that I’m getting so many more “ma’ams” than ever. And no man under the age of 60 even glances in my direction. Not that I need to be ogled but I really feel invisible. Just another older lady walking down the street. Avert your eyes.
Yeah, I’m going to agree with Lainey on this one. Very Demi-esque with that black hair…and, yes, there’s something weird about her mouth…you can see if more when she talks. Like too much filler or something? She’s gorgeous, as always…but there’s something weird and “off”…which bums me out.
Seriously, why do I care that these 2 are splitting?? Is it b/c they got married just after the Frug and I did? Is it b/c she was on Friends and I loved that show? B/c she and Jennifer Aniston are besties and you know that I love Jen??? Or, is it b/c we’re pretty much the same age?
I have no idea why. But I do care. And I’m sad! They didn’t seem like “The Perfect Couple” at all. But they seemed like 2 goofy and, dare I say, normal people (normal for Hollywood, kwim? I’m not that naive!) They weren’t always in the press saying those icky celebrity couple quotes”oh, he’s my soul mate’ and ‘we’re so happy and wonderful’ all the time…Not posing for People Magazine, being show offy, kwim? *sighs*
Another one bites the dust. I wonder if she and Jen will be out prowling together??? (A Frug fantasy! lol)
We all know I love Jen. But, hello? Why the same stupid mismatched bikini that we’ve seen her in? I swear this is the same one that she wore with John Mayer in Miami a few years back. She should have burned it! lol Lots of money…buy a new damn bikini.
One small, mean note..does anyone else think JA has put on a pound or 2? Not fat by any means. Just a bit thicker?
Btw, a certain Frugal friend of mine would love to be a fly on the wall on this vaca. Jen, Courteney Cox, Sheryl Crow. He would be in heaven.
Check out CeCe on the beach in a WHITE bikini. Beyotch is 45. What are our thoughts on what she’s had done? Tummy tuck? Lipo? There’s something about her face too…maybe some kind of filler? Regardless, it’s excellent work and she looks amazing. Sigh.
Well, I am not in love yet. I did like it tho. And, CeCe is looking good. Can’t believe she tried to look all ‘old’ by doing the elbow skin thing and the fake fat shaking. It was funny but hello? Courteney Cox is a fox! LOL Did anyone notice how many times she said WHORE? I think it was a shout out to ME! 😉
Best line…”we had sex like 3 times and you didn’t need a nap or pills or anything!” Loved it.
Will tune in next week. I did see some Monica-eque mannerisms but I didn’t think it screamed Monica Gellar in Cougartown, kwim?
Not sure if I am the first to coin this word. It refers to a woman who *thinks* she is a cougar but is in fact just an old whore. As in, “Wow, lots of cougwhores at Happy Hour tonight.” Or, “Hey, do my new extensions look fierce or do I look like a cougwhore?”