Archive | February 2012

Gwynnie

Soooo, thoughts on Gwyneth’s Oscar dress?? Am I the only one who wants to race up to her and snip that floor length cape off?? Yes, she looks gorgeous. A bit bland in the make-up department but still good. Glowy. The dress??  I really would have LOVED it without the stupid cape thing.  And, meow, she still has a little tummy pooch. 

Apparently Self-Esteem Issues are NOT Hereditary

The boys were all wooly headed so today was designated Haircut Day.  Sarcasmo endured it with his perma-scowl. 10? He sat transfixed by his own glorious image. At the end, he even stood up and did some poses in the mirror. *shakes head*

Sarcasmo: OMG, I saw you looking at yourself in that mirror!

10: Because I’m so handsome.

Sarcasmo:

10: And I attract women.

Sarcasmo:

Beware Of Purity Bear

This just made me *howl* with laughter. Purity Bear? Really?!

Have you seen this bitch Purity Bear before? Purity Bear is this total cock-blocking teddy bear who shows up in the heads of young people right when they’re about to freak their way to sin. This bitch will ruin your fuck times faster than a case of the runs. 

(click the link below to read more of what the evil genius Michael K has to say)

 

 

Beware Of Purity Bear.

Failentine’s Day

*sighs*

Tuesday. How could Valentine’s Day be a Tuesday?? Tuesday isn’t a Sexy Day at all. Friday and Saturday are Sexy Days. Wednesday is Hump Day so that’s obviously sexy. Thursday is thisclose to Friday so it counts. Sunday? Nah. Monday? NO. Tuesday NO!  I think that Valentine’s Day should always be a Friday or Saturday. Who’s with me??

Tuesday?!?!  It’s a “school night”, even if you don’t have kids!  And if you do, there’s homework to be done, baths, squabbles, etc. And the night before I had to fill out 10’s Valentines (none for Sarcasmo – “OMG MOM! NO ONE DOES VALENTINES!!“) and make cupcakes for his class too. Plus put together some VDay surprises for the Ungrateful Twins. Yes, I put it all off til the day before b/c I am an utter ADD failure of a person these days. *dramatic sigh*

Picked 10 up at school yesterday and his teacher sheepishly presented me with the cupcake container…that still had 6 cupcakes in it!!! WTF?!  I told 10 NOT to let any come back home!! So, I gave each kid one, I ate 2 and then had to bury the last 2 in the trash so I wouldn’t do a George Costanza and eat them out of the trash later on. Not really kidding.

Oh, I made homemade crab cakes that were delish. Naturally, 10 would NOT eat a “disgusting” crab cake and had fish sticks. Is he my kid or what? lol For dessert I bought strawberries and that Dolci Frutta stuff to dip them into! Yum, right? *sighs* Put the container in the microwave and proceeded to nuke the @$(& out of it. Burned the top later of the chocolate. Scraped it off, added some milk and it was okay. And by okay I mean that I stood there at the counter and ate it by the spoonful. *groans*

The Frug bought me a sweet card, some roses, and a lovely bottle of Prosecco.  Not that I could enjoy the bubbly b/c Sarcasmo had a basketball scrimmage from 8:20-9:30!!  ON VALENTINE’S DAY!!   And then, Mr. Procrastinator had to finish a science thing…and was up til 1am! ON VALENTINE’S DAY!!  And we all had to be up at 6:45am for school and whatnot.

I repeat, Tuesday is NOT a good day for Valentine’s Day. I demand a do-over AND a permanent move from 2/14 to “the 2nd Friday in February” or something!

Gwyneth and Rihanna!

Didn’t watch the Grammys due to lack of giving a sh*t about the Grammys. BUT, am enjoying some of the pix. Like that one with Gwynnie and Rihanna. OMG.  First of all, can I have that lighting for the rest of my life? Those 2 are glowing! Now, does anyone else think that Rihanna is looking amazing AND maybe just maybe making Mistress G look…fat?? RiRi is very sleek and I happen to detect a teeny tiny microscopic pooch on Gwyneth. *giddy twirls* *mutters* Fecking Gwyneth!

Discuss.

 

Lainey’s Entertainment Update – Celebrity Gossip | Article Detail.

QOTD: Justin Theroux On Jennifer Aniston

 

OMG, Michael K!!  I heart yoooooooouuuuuu!

An excerpt from his “article” on Jennifer Aniston’s man:

But I only did it for the lightning veins and peek-a-pubes Justin is flashing in that picture above. But you know, it’s a little surprising that Justin still has a full crotch bush. By now, you’d think that Jennifer would’ve shaved all his pubes off while he was napping and crocheted them into a thong that she wears every minute of the day so he’ll always be close to her. Yeah, I bet she’s already done that. Dude is totally wearing a merkin.

*dying laughing*

 

QOTD: Justin Theroux On Jennifer Aniston.

Whitney Houston Dead at 48 | Splash

So, yeah. In case you’ve been under a rock all weekend, I have sad news. Whitney Houston is dead. I got the news (from a very chatty American Foxhound *winks*) last night at a party. I did a completely Hollywood-esque double take. Even though Whitney had been drugged up and completely trainwreckish for years, her death still stunned me. And now that some of the details are coming out?? Holy cow. From what I’ve read, she took Xanax or something and had been drinking — took a bath and apparently drowned. Whoa. Lots of people take Xanax…lots of people drink. Is there a warning on the bottle not to take a bath?? (not that I’m thinking it was as simple as that but still!)

I’m also seeing lots of focus on her poor daughter. Even a photo of the girl on a stretcher being taken to the hospital herself. Is it that shocking that Whitney’s daughter would be freaked out by her mom dying??  Do they have to take such intrusive photos??? *sighs*

I have “I Will Always Love You” on an annoying loop in my head. I loved that song. Whitney from the 80s forever.

RIP Whitney.

Whitney Houston Dead at 48 | Splash.