In Non-Shocking News…

All the major sites are reporting that Bruce Jenner IS transitioning into a woman. This is truly NOT A SHOCK. It’s been pretty obvious, right? I started making note of it back in Jan of 2012!

He’s going to have a series (of course he is) documenting all of it. Well, that’s one way to handle it! lol Right in the public eye, like a good Kardashian!

Good luck to you, Bruce. Seriously. This is some major shit and having the world staring at you cannot be easy. (so let’s make it into a TV show! Sigh)

Adventures in Hoarding — Make-up Edition

Make-up. I love it. Always have. When I was in elementary school I started wearing blush. Now, most girls have to sneak it or hide it from their moms. Not I. My own mother gave me a Coty pink blush stick when I was maybe 10 years old. Yes, I was that pale. lol

Over the years, I’ve developed what The Frug would call a “problem.” Disagree. It’s a collection. A hobby, if you will. He collects beer cans, I collect shades of brown eye shadow. Samesies.

One thing I do have a problem with is unpacking. Oh, and make-up bags. And unpacking make-up bags. Decided to empty out the 5+ bags I’ve never unpacked from various trips. Also cleared out my “under the bathroom sink” area, misc. shopping bags in the computer room, and a mysterious box I’ve had on my bedside table for years.

Result?

makeup

 

This isn’t all of it. I know I have more make-up and misc. beauty products somewhere. This is the iceberg but there’s more “tip” somewhere! (but where??)

Such a collection. I’m not a snob. There are drugstore items from ELF that are like $1 each and then there’s the high end stuff from Guerlain and Creme de La Mer. (samples only of La Mer b/c holyshitpricey)

The most interesting thing I found was this:
pie

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yes, that’s a plastic MdDonald’s apple pie. What of it?? Most people have them.

Here’s an interesting bit of miscellany:

random

The pie, a flower pin made by one of the kids in 2008, a cat collar (and Fiona was never, ever going to wear that!), a key chain from a long-forgotten drunk fest on the Eastern Shore circa 1999 maybe?, and a cheerleading pin from the 80s.

Huh. Hoarding? Nah.

So, here are some numbers to chew on:

Hair products – 17

Teeth – 5

Deodorants- 4

Body/tanning/lotions – 22 (and 6 temp tatts! lol)

Nails – 16

Face – masks/creams/lotions – 34

Face – concealers/ bb creams/other – 12

Mascara – 8

Bronzer/ blush/ luminizers – 21

Eyes –  43

Lip – 41

So, 229. Hmm. And yet still not enough.

 

 

 

Programming Note

If you’re accessing this via kellybexblog.com, please don’t!! I moved the blog to kellysuperficial.com a year or so ago!! The little rerouter thingy expired a long time ago too!

However, for some unknown reason, when I do a post from my phone, it posts to kellybexblog. *sighs* Fixing this asap.

Anyway.

Please head over kellysuperficial.com and sign up to be a Superficial Sister to get all the latest nonsense from me!

And It’s DONE

Dear God. Spent the last few days re-doing Master Pedro’s room. Nothing fancy, just moved a larger bed into his room, rearranged the furniture, got some new “teen” bedding, etc.

EXHAUSTING!

We took a queen bed we had in the guest room (frugal) and moved Pedro’s old twin bed in there. You should have seen the misc. stuff we found under the old beds. For example, an old National Enquirer’s “Worst Beach Bodies” magazine from 2009. All kinds of old dog bones. *shudders*  One shoe that’s been missing for years. In Pedro’s room? An Easter basket, with some candy and empty wrappers. Please note we haven’t been home for Easter in probably 6 years. *shudders*

Now, the 5’7″ inch teen can spread out while he sleeps. The 105 lb dog? Not so much. He is currently in full-on pout over it. He is lying beside it with the saddest puppy dog eyes…  I am a crazy animal person so I am rather worried about the poor dog being traumatized over the reduced bed size. lol

Just look at him! Poor angel.  (ignore all the random crap on the floor — the guest room is in transition. Ahem)

otisbed

Oooh! Fun Stuff in People StyleWatch!

Anyone else eagerly await the monthly People StyleWatch?? My fave is the one with all the spring previews. This month’s was good too though.

Could this replace Botox? Probably not but it’s worth a try, right?! It’s “only” $89 so…

wrinkle

I have already tried this. It says it will keep you dry for 48 hours. Hmph. Maybe not for the perimenopausal. It goes on dry though which is nice. I’d say it’s the best of the “super power” antiperspirants that I’ve tried (and I have tried them ALL)…

dove

Just in time for Valentine’s Day!

lips

Love this. Tinted lip oil??!! Sounds sheer and hydrating. YSL is super swanky too. A must! ysl

Lash extension kit? Yay! Sounds easy to use. I’m concerned about the potential for severe clumping BUT for $15, it’s a must try.

lashes

Now, this?? A fake brow piercing kit?? Um, okay. So much to do with your brows these days… This would be fun for a goth costume, I s’pose.

piercings

 

 

Illness Musing

I’ve been sick for FOREVER! *sniffles* The latest iteration is an ear infection (what? Am I 4?) and general nausea and GI pain.

Foodies look away. The only food that is making me feel better is Campbell’s chicken noodle soup. No organic, free range nonsense. Gimme the sodium and yellow food dye, baby! Oh, and Saltines. Only the old school Premium brand with salt. No whole wheat or unsalted tops, thank you very much.

The only complaint with this salty comfort panacea is the whatthehellisthat chewy “chicken” cubes. What part of the chicken is that? Why so chewy?! Aahhhh

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Shopping with the Frug

We have a new monthly “date.” The Frug and I shop together at COSTCO once a month. Exciting, right? Sexy! In an attempt to corral my spending, the Frug decided that we should try this whole “buying in bulk” thing. We’ve had a Costco membership in the past but when I would go, I would see shiny things that I had to have, list be damned! And, they sell clothes there!

Anyway, that is NOT how the Frug shops. There is not just a list, it’s a mega list, printed, pruned, agonized over. I do not participate. I just say “hey, make sure we have eggs on the list.” Not that I don’t use lists. I do. I make a grocery list and then leave it in the car. Or, I have my list and then I sort of get bored by it in the store and just buy whatever looks good. You can see how I am a threat to the Frug’s sanity.

Once in the store, the price comparisons start. Kirkland brand versus name brand. Cost of Diet Pepsi versus Diet Coke (not that that matters! Diet Coke FOREVER!). Cost per gallon for milk compared to regular grocery stores. Shoot. Me. Here he is in all his frugal glory:frugcostco

I think he was pricing out white tube socks. *sighs*

The “process” takes about 90 minutes. It’s excruciating. I dislike shopping with others. I like to be solo. Flying the thru store, grabbing what I need, and what I don’t. No one asking “Cow, how much is a 24 pack of AA batteries at Target?” (the hell if I know!) No one asking “How many chicken tenders do the kids eat per week?” Um, what?

At the end, we have the “Do we or Don’t we?” over the hot dog and soda combo. It’s like a dollar for a hot dog and soda. BUT, they’ve changed from DC to DP. So no. No deal is worth drinking Diet Pepsi in a damn warehouse after 90 minutes of spreadsheets and cost comparisons. Nope. It crushes the Frug to pass up such a bargain. lol

Happy Frugmas!

 

How’s Your Brow Game?

I have been way off my brow game this past year. Went cheap and paid the price later. Was getting a pedi and asked for a spur-of-the-moment brow wax. Just a cleanup. What could go wrong??? *sighs*  I like my brows to be full, defined, yet clean. Welp, I ended up sparse and tadpole-ish. I waited months for them to grow in. MONTHS. Fun fact: brows eventually give up on you. I used to have to get them waxed monthly. Now it’s been 5 months and I could still wait. It’s scary. I just have blonde tumbleweeds underneath and between the brows. Oh-so-pretty.

Pick your brow shape and stick with it. Don’t go trendy. Growing up with Brooke Shields and her fantastic full brows was a Godsend for a wooly-browed Irish lass like me. All I needed to fix was going from one brow to two. Easy peasy. I blame all the 90s skinny brow chicks for my later trauma. (Gwynnie, Jen, Gwen Stefani, etc) How are brows trendy?? This year, big bushy ones are in. Cara Delevingne, Lily Collins. Next year it’ll be that bleached nonsense or back to super-skinny. I am DONE messing with my brow shape.

Sadly, not only are mine now refusing to grow back, they are gray in areas. *shrieks* Insult to injury, amigas.

Today I got brave and went to the Benefit Brow Bar at Ulta. A lovely young woman named Ena tinted and waxed the brows!  It cost just $32 for this — it’s about $50 at the fancy place in Georgetown I used to splurge on. (plus parking, gas getting there, etc) #alwaysfrugal. It’s hard to tell from this photo because I have a lamp next to the computer that’s making one side look lighter than the other. They are both a light-medium brown. I like to have a good contrast between the brows and the hair on my head!  Also, ignore the weird scar I have on that side too. #scarface Overall, I’m pleased. She was quick and efficient and not too chatty

.Photo on 12-4-14 at 7.03 PM

 

I did, naturally, find some new products to test. Both promise to not just add color to the brows, but volume too!

Maybelline Brow Drama (love that name!)

Blinc Brow Mousse

I like the look of the Maybelline one. The brush looks interesting AND it’s $8 versus $24 for the Blinc! #soveryfrugal

Another cool item that I am going to try the hell out of is a wax brow stick from NYX. It’s supposed to be able to tame the outer edges of my brows that like to stick up and make me look (more) evil. It’s also only around $8 so…mine mine mine!

That’s all for now. If you have any brow tips, leave comments!

 

A F*ck Me Day…

Well, it’s been a while but today is definitely a Fuck Me Day. Started off the morning cold and rainy. It was supposed to be a “wintry mix” but luckily it was too warm for that. By “too warm” I mean 39°. *scowl* I had to help Pedro deal with his disgusting awful dripping nose so I was covered in snot by 7am. Dropped him off at school and then got a text from Sarcasmo that he had forgotten his backpack (HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?) so I did some helicopter parenting over to his school. Took me one hour round-trip (maybe 5 miles total) because people in DC just simply cannot drive if there’s any sort of precipitation!!  aahhh

Came home and showered and got ready for my annual date with the gyno. *twirls* BEST!  (click here to read my deep thoughts on dates with gynos) Now, it was very interesting today, as opposed to merely terrifying and mildly uncomfortable.  We talked about cock rings and various vibrators – While. She. Was. In. Me.  93740275 shades of awkward. A friend on Twitter suggested that this would be a great podcast — “Talking Sex Toys with my Gyno” Hmm. Like “Coffee Talk” but with my vagina. And sex toys. And a gyno.

Anyway.

Decided to cleanse my palette by going to the mall and browsing. Only browsing, of course. #frugal When I was leaving, I put my parking ticket in the automated pay thingy and yahoo! Ticket jam! 10 minutes of sitting there with angry people behind me. Fantastic. I decided to try to reverse karma so I gave a homeless person standing in the rain on the median some money.

Maybe that will turn my day around? We shall see.

Don’t Look Now — I’m HAPPY!

I know, I know. Who has hacked my blog?!?!

Kind of a weird feeling. I am having the BEST Thanksgiving Weekend! We went up to Baltimore to my SIL’s for dinner and so much wine on Thursday. The Frug made sure we were the first to arrive and the last (of the family) to leave. He is Mr. Social, after all. We stayed in a hotel in the Inner Harbor and “enjoyed” the dry-hotel-air-snoring-post-turkey-and-lasagna-flatulence night. Woke up and had a greasy diner breakfast and drove home.

That’s it.

No trekking to the mountains of NE PA. No quick trip to Phillie. Just came home. Whoa. It felt so fffrrreeeee. I grinned the entire drive home from Baltimore. No traffic. No time table. No obligations. Nada.

In years past, today we would have been fighting the dreaded Sunday-after-Thanksgiving traffic. Worst/busiest travel day of the year. Nope, not this year. I am still scarred by the 8 hour journey we made a few years ago. (it was 8 instead of 5 due to, what else? A truck accident. GET OFF MY ROADS,  TRUCKS!)

Instead, today I spent the day decorating the house for Christmas whilst the Frug and Sarcasmo screamed their lungs out at the Ravens game. (And, funnily enough, THEY got to enjoy the post-holiday traffic! Poor Sarcasmo got a baptism by fire today!) Poor Pedro has a nasty (read: juicy) cold and was very quiet and low key. God love a sick kid! Woot. haha

So, next up is ordering the stupid Xmas cards (Dear Baby Jesus, please help me find even ONE photo with Sarcasmo semi-smiling or at least not doing his smug sneer) and then the tree! If things go as smoothly as this weekend has, it will be the BEST CHRISTMAS EVER!

(how much have I jinxed myself with this weird and cheerful post?????)